Mistress

[Smeagol]

Originally Posted by DO_YOU_BJ

This is a game.
Pure mental and physical domination.
Though my methods do require $$$, its the best safe bet.

So many SBF bro quoting your famous article.... everyway I surf i get pointed towards this thread.

Very interesting cheong/BY principles you have elaborated here.

From my cheonging experience..... I will have to disagree with almost everything you mentioned for reason which are very personal to me. I don't think I want to explain myself..... it will be rude.

Like you say... there's no right or wrong... just different style of cheonging.

To every readers.... read but digest with loads of discretion. The best way to learn is always by your own experience.

warbird, DY...... still have not open the macallan. I will be travelling next friday..... any chance to catch up??

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Duuno leh, that post like attract too much attention liao, me must go into hiding liao....
Diff strokes for diff strokes this i gotta agree bro.
Works for me but I am sure not for all
Diff playing budgets will require diff tactics
As for the bottle, its ok, no one chasing you for it, feels better knowing one day when I go bankrupt, I know who to look for for a free bottle hehehehe

[Smeagol]

Originally Posted by DO_YOU_BJ

\
As for the bottle, its ok, no one chasing you for it, feels better knowing one day when I go bankrupt, I know who to look for for a free bottle hehehehe

ehhh.... actually i chasing the 2 of you leh...... not much time left leow.

[colins]

Wah lots of happenings, principles, theories and experience sharing here.

I guess those principles which Bro DYBJ mentioned applies to all WL la. To me, every girl working in this industry is WL, what matters is price only.

Bro Smeagol, last I heard was you couldn't attend leh. We already had 4 bottles that night. To go into Bro DYBJ's room, we usually go in with 3 bottles min. We can take turns to foot the bill but if you are new we can always split the one-five. Find it quite funny that you're still talking about the macallan.

[justime]

Got to apologize to everyone that I have been quite remiss in posting these couple of days. I am also not very diligent in updating the “reality blog”.

First off, got to mention the fact that XH has left for China (Shenyang) on Sunday. Permanently or not, I don’t know presently.

However, prior to her leaving, I spent the entire Friday, Saturday and Part of Sunday on a mini honeymoon jaunt with her. As such, I do not really have the time or inclination to post any message, except occasionally logging in to have a quick read. (Details about XH to follow ……)

Just a couple of thoughts:

1) Different Viewpoints

What I am very encouraged to note is the sheer multiplicity of opinions and counterviews being expressed here. It shows independence of opinion and thought. It demonstrates the rich tapestry of different experiences of each Cheonging encounter(s).

I have maintained throughout in this thread that I do not possess all the answers. I am also pretty confident that there does NOT exists a unified singular BY – Cheong – GF – relationship theory that can be applicable for ALL brothers.

In this regard, I thereby actively encourage every reader here to formulate their own personal relationship principle(s) in the context of your unique life’s journey.

A flashback on some of my earlier posts if you will:

Originally Posted by justime

....

1) Yes, I do recognize that love and sex can be expressed in a myriad of ways. Some prefer being the dominant party, others the submissive. One side of the scale is sheer hedonistic debauchery while the other side is celibacy. Having a Patron based Mistress relationship is certainly not for everyone. Numerous people are happy and contented to operate only within the matrix of a monogamous relationship. All are valid choices with no one superior over the other.

Originally Posted by justime

(Remember to always judge the success of a strategy against actual experience and results and not what you think should be correct. Take my statement at face value and validate it yourself against the actual result of your interaction if you should take my advise.).

Originally Posted by justime

** It should be bladdy obvious that you should question why something is bladdy obvious in the first place !!!!

Cheers!

Originally Posted by justime

Despite the heavy theorizing in this thread, I am pretty sure that most of you would have deduced by now that I am a firm advocate of “praxis”. Don’t believe what I write no matter how eloquent I sound. Theory must be validated against experience in order to make it meaningful and of use to you. Ultimately, there is NO substitute for direct experience.

.......
Whether you are hesitant on BY or simply want to just empower yourself a little within the context of your present relationship - Just dive into it experientially.

Go for the ride and bear in mind the principles I mentioned. Apply the concepts and masterstrokes and you will see that your journey is so much more enjoyable. Test it – “rubber hits road” against your own experience. If you had a bad experience previously, all the better. You will plainly see the stark difference between what you have done wrong previously and the new improved approach you take in courting girls or BY.

To be continued …

[justime]

2) Relevance

(A lot this material below extracted from a Private Conversation)

One of the key objectives of the mistress thread is meant to address unfair exchange between a WL & her bf/Robert.

Yes, the first part of the mistress thread is admittedly and intentionally done to generate interest in this thread. I extracted an interesting and not oft used concept as a novel way in order to invite readership.

1) It should be however obvious that this is a “Rich Men’s Strategy” and not wholly suitable for most people – hence the unrealistic perception that it can sometimes generate.

That being said, although they are not rich per se, many Bros have got the money to indulge in a WL (whether BY or simply keep them as a high maintenance GF).

And the sad thing is that instead of letting money put him in a “power” position, the monetary advantage gets lost in his interactions with a WL.

I have seen too many brothers here ‘bankrupted’ by the manipulations of WL – simply because they don’t know how to handle their own emotions with regards to interacting with WL. (Sad but true, you hardly see a ‘rich’ Chinaman being manipulated like our locals by WL. They know that who holds the money is king. Hence sometimes the negative perception by the Chinese mei mei that Singapore men are naive).

To this end, my constant harping about empowerment and bringing fair value (especially monetary) into the relationship has already helped certain brothers. They are more circumspect in how they spend money – especially with regards to WL.

2) If you continue reading the thread, you will notice that I am slowly gravitating towards another very important defense mechanism. That is to “Create choices and Options for yourself”. I aim to go further, not only do cast your net in terms of choice for different ladies, you cast your net in terms of the range of personal life choices you can make. This important tool of empowerment is equally relevant to the everyday man as it is to the tycoon.

3) If you patiently go through the threads, you would also see that the “everyday man” focus slowly coming into the fore. From Mistress-seduction tactics, the focus is now toward self-empowerment. And that means taking control of your life choices and financial destiny. It something a lot of people can relate to and they did according to the feedback I receive.

I am not sure how many brothers detect the evolution that I talked about. But I am glad to report that in my private correspondence with some bros, many brothers here actually GOT the point about empowerment I am trying to make. They are not interested so much on “Masterstroke” per se – and see it only as a metaphor.

I also got several encouraging and heartening feedback on this. Some brothers have told me that since learning about empowerment, they are now more circumspect on the wiles of the WL – and refused to take any crap from them! They saved money and know when to disengage a disempowering and unproductive relationship. For that alone, I have achieved my modest objective when I first embark on this thread.

(When I first started this little project, I told myself that as long as two or three person can be ‘figuratively saved’ from emotional & financial devastation I will be exceedingly happy as I had achieve my goal. Now it appears that a little more than three persons have benefited from the concept of empowerment….)

[Smeagol]

Originally Posted by colins

Bro Smeagol, last I heard was you couldn't attend leh. We already had 4 bottles that night. To go into Bro DYBJ's room, we usually go in with 3 bottles min. We can take turns to foot the bill but if you are new we can always split the one-five. Find it quite funny that you're still talking about the macallan.

yeah... couldn't make it that nite..... fever until 38++ degrees. Don't think you want me to show up sneezing, coughing, spreading germs, bacterias and viruses rite? Wanna to enjoy enjoy comfortably.... so sick how to enjoy leh.

Nothing funny about the mention of the Macallan..... I say I open means I open. Last thing u need to worry is about me being a freeloader. U got a point to make.....eh......just put it plainly hor.......

[Big B]

I am amazed at the amount of wisdom & insights the TS and others have included. This should be required reading for anyone who wants to play with or is attempting to get a mistress. The information provided here, IMHO, covers not only the art of "mistressing" but also governs the principles of having paid company.

By sharing their collective experience with the rest of us mere mortals, we can save ourselves some time, money and unnecessary heartache. This forum does well indeed to attact contributors of such calibre.

Based on all that I've read and absorbed, it seems to me that there are 2fundamental keys to becoming a successful chiongster:

1) Be confident (by understanding how our enemy thinks & rules of the game)
2) Be prepared to walk away (by not putting all your eggs in 1 basket)

There are of course, many other valuable skills and masterstrokes which the contributors have expounded upon which alleviate them to the category of best-of-the-best.

However, just like in real life, some guys will be better at this than others. For blokes like me who aren't trail blazers, we will just need to fight tooth and claw amongst ourselves for the leftovers.

Would love to meet up with gurus such as bro justime (a reference to Just in Time strategies? If so, it is very appropriate!) and bro DO_YOU_BJ in the near future if only to put a face to the lessons I have learnt here. Xiao Di dun earn much but 1st round is definitely on me.

[sing11235813]

I wish to first express my gratitude to bro Jus for having started this thread and for dispensing his wisdom. You are certainly a very generous person, and command my utmost respect. Looks like you treat BY like a chess game hobby, and like to share and discuss strategies. So, this posting is meant to stimulate such strategy discussion by presenting a different variation! (By the way, this is my very first posting—initially I came to SBF to merely browse through, but bro Jus has inspired me to write-up!)

My Background
Early 50s, financial industry professional. Average looks, well groomed.
Can comfortably afford say 100K per year for “recreational” activities.
Have been with OC for 20+ years, 3 kids 22, 20, 18. Don’t want to break their hearts, so don’t ever want to be found out.
Moderate libido, don’t need to do it every day (sometimes can even go for a week or two without doing it).
Never done any BY before, so complete noob, but don’t want to die not having tried it.

Ideal Target
20-24 yo MM (PRC?)
Very chio face
Average height, B-cup, slim

Initial Thoughts on Target
My opinion is that getting more “ordinary” PRC MM like waitress, salesgirl, hairdresser better than KTV/HFJ/HC/FL/WL
They are more likely NOT to have been over-bonked (feels better to ride a relatively new car), and more likely to be disease-free
If we try to think about the psychology of these “working in ordinary jobs” MM, I have to guess that their primary objective to be here is still to earn money, but are unwilling to work in KTV/HC/FL/WL. As a result, their monthly take home is probably around 1-2K. So, although they may be more difficult to land, I’m guessing that they might still be open to the idea of BY if the price is right.

Initial Thoughts on the BY Deal
I thought about the advantages of a medium-term BY (eg: 6-12 months), or even a long-term BY (more than 12 months). You get to use her more regularly, and enjoy over a longer period of time, maybe lower per bonk price, etc.
But then, the disadvantages will also start to stack up:
(1) Like bro Warbird and many others, pretty much the novelty factor of bonking a new girl wears off after a couple of times. So, while you’re still paying the same amount, the pleasure is probably less, and will keep diminishing;
(2) She has a higher chance of knowing exactly who you are, as in your real name, where you live and work, who your OC is etc. This could potentially be a big problem if she later decides to squeeze you by threatening to go to your OC, or kick up a fuss at your office: not a problem for some, but certainly a problem for me;
(3) You have to worry about what she does behind your back. It seems like many of bro Jus’ and bro DYBJ’s strategies deal with how to keep a tab on the MM. This takes energy, and you can’t be 100% sure anyway unless you really have the time to be with her all the time, which I don’t have.

So, I’m thinking, instead of short-term BY, but over-pay by a lot. For instance, a weekly deal of say 6K per week, plus potential bonus at the end. For instance:
(a) 2.5 K upfront upon initial bonk
(b) 2.5 K at the end of the week
(c) I decide by the end of the week whether to extend another week. If yes, then I’ll give you another 2.5K upfront, and 2.5 K at the end of that week. Absolutely no request for any gifts, etc during the period of BY.
(d) When I decide to call it off, I’ll give you a parting bonus depending on how happy you make me feel. So, can range from zero to whatever I feel like, maybe averaging about 2.5K.

Some comments on this strategy
(1) This becomes a simple 1 or 2-week rendezvous, so the fresh, initial GFE would be there throughout the BY
(2) The MM doesn’t feel short-changed because it’ll just feel like a short fling with loads of money for compensation (I can go even higher if necessary depending on the quality of the girl)
(3) From day 1, it’s a take it or leave it deal. Plus I get full discretion to dispense the bonus. So, in Jus’ words, it’ll be a patron, domineering relationship and not a DFR relationship.
(4) Little chance of the girl knowing who I actually am, and probably little incentive to pursue me later on as she probably has some measure of “self shame” from having accepted an “indecent proposal”: remember, she works in a regular job, not one where she is expected to do these kinds of things.
(5) Don’t have to worry about what she does behind your back. This is because you get to choose when you want to start the BY, so obviously you choose a period where you are free. So, for those 1-2 weeks, you can spend a lot of time with her and bonk her to your heart’s content, very much like a vacation. And after it’s over, who cares?
(6) It may seem expensive to pursue this strategy at first glance (about 7.5K for 1 week or 12.5K for 2 weeks of enjoyment). Yes, it is expensive, so it rules out those who can’t afford it. But, for moderate libido people, I can probably live with engaging in 1 “project” every 1-2 months. Total annual cost comes up to say 100K, which is probably what a regular BY costs anyway (but I get to bonk 6-8 different ones!)

I am prepared to be humbled by more experienced bros who think that this is a load of crap.

[singlad]

Originally Posted by DO_YOU_BJ

Yahoo! Babel Fish - Text Translation and Web Page Translation

Thanks a lot.

[colins]

Originally Posted by Smeagol

yeah... couldn't make it that nite..... fever until 38++ degrees. Don't think you want me to show up sneezing, coughing, spreading germs, bacterias and viruses rite? Wanna to enjoy enjoy comfortably.... so sick how to enjoy leh.

Nothing funny about the mention of the Macallan..... I say I open means I open. Last thing u need to worry is about me being a freeloader. U got a point to make.....eh......just put it plainly hor.......

Ah...valid reasons la. We missed your 中国腔 dearly that night but I reckon you might not pass the temp check at the counter anyways, so I think I've wronged you.

I know you say you can open, sorry not my intention to check you on one bottle. My point is, I want to chase you for 3 bottles liao. Hahaha...

[JediSkull]

summary:
it USUALLY boils down to MONEY when it comes to the art of keeping a mistress.

As my frens always say: MONEY IS NOT THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL. IT'S THE LACK OF IT!

Though there are RARE cases like that of my fren who has a mistress (degree holder who does her own business in china. But having had breakup with her bf, came over to singapore to whore herself only to fall in love with my friend) who doesn't require any maintainence! My friend only spend about
SGD$3k screwing her a month and building enough kc when she was in SG.

After building the kc, he convinced her to go back to china and even made it clear that he was married and asked if she could accept that. She's very independent. Has various apartments and a nice car in China. Made her money through trading hospital equipment. Speaks fluent English. All she wanted is my friend to give up his wife n children and be with her. My friend's wife was an ex ktv hostress. His mistress cannot accept the fact that although she wins his wife in many categories: looks, brains and charm. She cannot get my fren to get a divorce and was forced to compromise and be a mistress.

Amazing thing is that my friend having paid for the whoring he did for a month. He did not pay anything more after that. Instead he earned himself a nice mistress who plays a good host to his friends who ever visit china.

He even had her bring my friends and I to many places of our interest in China .

KUDOS to bro DYBJ(Direct Approach strategy) and Justime(Return On Investment strategy)! This thread deserves a sticky!

It's Really like a "How to keep mistresses guide for dummies"!

[slider_72]

Originally Posted by cablesnwires

P/S: For those who are into the chocolatey thingie game, I use honey as a substitute as honey is a healthier choice and taste as sweet too!

For a moment there, I thought you were talking about buying your girl honey instead of Marks and Spencer chocolates. Pheeew... Panic siah.

[warbird]

Originally Posted by sing11235813

I wish to first express my gratitude to bro Jus for having started this thread and for dispensing his wisdom. You are certainly a very generous person, and command my utmost respect. Looks like you treat BY like a chess game hobby.....................

My Background
Early 50s, financial industry professional. Average looks, well groomed.
Can comfortably afford say 100K per year for “recreational” activities.
Have been with OC for 20+ years..........................
Never done any BY before, so complete noob, but don’t want to die not having tried it.

Hi bro sing, we share a number of similarities...but I dun mind spending much more if the meat is very enticing, fresh n juicy, hahaha. Yes, u must try BY before u pass on.

Originally Posted by sing11235813

Ideal Target
20-24 yo MM (PRC?)
Very chio face
Average height, B-cup, slim

My ideal quarries r:

18-23 yo PRC MMs
165-175, slim w/ proportionate figure, natural B/C boobs
Of course face must be chio. Very subjective here bcos one man's meat is...

Originally Posted by sing11235813

Initial Thoughts on Target
My opinion is that getting more “ordinary” PRC MM like waitress, salesgirl, hairdresser better than KTV/HFJ/HC/FL/WL
They are more likely NOT to have been over-bonked (feels better to ride a relatively new car), and more likely to be disease-free
If we try to think about the psychology of these “working in ordinary jobs” MM, I have to guess that their primary objective to be here is still to earn money, but are unwilling to work in KTV/HC/FL/WL. As a result, their monthly take home is probably around 1-2K. So, although they may be more difficult to land, I’m guessing that they might still be open to the idea of BY if the price is right.

I'm always searching to BY PRC MMs who work in ordinary jobs. But most of them r homely. There r rare exceptions...

Right now I'm negotiating w a 19 yo Fujian MM, born Jan 1990, a hairstylist working in a salon in Chinatown. Face quite chio n cute, 160-161, 46kg, nice boobs n butt. Demands 5k a month n upfront payment for her debt of 16K. She is a bit short for my liking. Upfront payment is also an obstacle. Her recent HIV n RPR, taken 1 wk ago, were negative (requested n paid by me). She also wants long-term arrangement. I'm very hesitant to consummate the deal as I live in Gotham City . PM me if u r interested.

Originally Posted by sing11235813

Initial Thoughts on the BY Deal
I thought about the advantages of a medium-term BY (eg: 6-12 months), or even a long-term BY (more than 12 months). You get to use her more regularly, and enjoy over a longer period of time, maybe lower per bonk price, etc.
But then, the disadvantages will also start to stack up:
(1) Like bro Warbird and many others, pretty much the novelty factor of bonking a new girl wears off after a couple of times. So, while you’re still paying the same amount, the pleasure is probably less, and will keep diminishing;
............................................
(3) You have to worry about what she does behind your back. It seems like many of bro Jus’ and bro DYBJ’s strategies deal with how to keep a tab on the MM. This takes energy, and you can’t be 100% sure anyway unless you really have the time to be with her all the time, which I don’t have.

So, I’m thinking, instead of short-term BY, but over-pay by a lot. For instance, a weekly deal of say 6K per week, plus potential bonus at the end. For instance:
(a) 2.5 K upfront upon initial bonk
(b) 2.5 K at the end of the week
(c) I decide by the end of the week whether to extend another week. If yes, then I’ll give you another 2.5K upfront, and 2.5 K at the end of that week. Absolutely no request for any gifts, etc during the period of BY.
(d) When I decide to call it off, I’ll give you a parting bonus depending on how happy you make me feel. So, can range from zero to whatever I feel like, maybe averaging about 2.5K.

Some comments on this strategy
(1) This becomes a simple 1 or 2-week rendezvous, so the fresh, initial GFE would be there throughout the BY
(2) The MM doesn’t feel short-changed because it’ll just feel like a short fling with loads of money for compensation (I can go even higher if necessary depending on the quality of the girl)
(3) From day 1, it’s a take it or leave it deal. Plus I get full discretion to dispense the bonus. So, in Jus’ words, it’ll be a patron, domineering relationship and not a DFR relationship.
(4) Little chance of the girl knowing who I actually am, and probably little incentive to pursue me later on as she probably has some measure of “self shame” from having accepted an “indecent proposal”: remember, she works in a regular job, not one where she is expected to do these kinds of things.
(5) Don’t have to worry about what she does behind your back. This is because you get to choose when you want to start the BY, so obviously you choose a period where you are free. So, for those 1-2 weeks, you can spend a lot of time with her and bonk her to your heart’s content, very much like a vacation. And after it’s over, who cares?
(6) It may seem expensive to pursue this strategy at first glance (about 7.5K for 1 week or 12.5K for 2 weeks of enjoyment). Yes, it is expensive, so it rules out those who can’t afford it. But, for moderate libido people, I can probably live with engaging in 1 “project” every 1-2 months. Total annual cost comes up to say 100K, which is probably what a regular BY costs anyway (but I get to bonk 6-8 different ones!)

I am prepared to be humbled by more experienced bros who think that this is a load of crap.

Yo bro,

Good strategy! Especially applicable for my unique situation. After a couple of wks of unlimited access to the choice meat, the prettiest gal may not look so attractive anymore, hahaha.

Your offer is quite generous n u should be able to get some gems for the money.

Cheers!

[sing11235813]

Originally Posted by warbird

I'm always searching to BY PRC MMs who work in ordinary jobs. But most of them r homely. There r rare exceptions...

You're right. But, then, homely also means less-bonked and purer! So, if you are successful, the feeling is better too. If she is one who says yes to every proposition that comes along, then the fun and challenge is not there anymore.

I guess, this is where bro Jus' masterstroke comes in: accidentally spill coffee on her (if she is a waitress) when she serves your table! Than offer to buy her new clothes the next day.

Originally Posted by warbird

Right now I'm negotiating w a 19 yo Fujian MM, born Jan 1990, a hairstylist working in a salon in Chinatown. Face quite chio n cute, 160-161, 46kg, nice boobs n butt. Demands 5k a month n upfront payment for her debt of 16K. She is a bit short for my liking. Upfront payment is also an obstacle. Her recent HIV n RPR, taken 1 wk ago, were negative (requested n paid by me). She also wants long-term arrangement. I'm very hesitant to consummate the deal as I live in Gotham City . PM me if u r interested.

Bro warbird, you are very generous. But, I am really not into the messiness of long-term arrangements. Also, I think it's better to hunt by myself rather than to have one handed on a platter.

A quick question on tests: where can I bring a prospect for quick, discreet test for all the common diseases? I'm assuming it's a nice private clinic? And are HIV and RPR (this is for syphillis right?) the only thing you test for? I'm a little pananoid when it comes to diseases, as you can probably guess by now.

Originally Posted by warbird

Good strategy! Especially applicable for my unique situation. After a couple of wks of unlimited access to the choice meat, the prettiest gal may not look so attractive anymore, hahaha.

Your offer is quite generous n u should be able to get some gems for the money.

Maybe you should look into such short-term BY as well!