Quote:
Originally Posted by driedlemon3
I have read alot here abt bros talking abt their sad sexless life.... all of us go into a relationship cos there was an initial attraction, we call it love n eventually we got married n hv kids. Technically that shd be the pinnacles of happiness but not so behind closed door. Many women also talk abt their sexless lives, just no equivalent of SBF for us to start a thread and discuss openly. No we didn't let ourselves go n turn into an ugly fat potato nor do we binge on Korean drama. most of us wanted so much for intimacy too but somehow I guess both sides take each other for granted, no more sweet words, act of service n slowly both sides don't feel loved anymore. For men, it's impt to connect thru sex to feel loved. For us, we need to feel loved in daily life to want to have sex. We feel resentful as our man only hug n kiss us when he wants sex, otherwise we felt like leper that he won't even touch or notice we hv a new dress or look gd on an occasion. The resentment actually builds up n when our man initiates sex we pretended to do other things to avoid it cos it felt empty. Too many of us felt this way n some actually go ahead to cheat on the marriage. It's a sad vicious cycle. I wrote all these here not because I want to blame our men here. It's more to make aware that the rejection in the bedroom is often an emotion already building up over months and years. It's not about how much our man earn, how he looks, it's a build up of feeling of unloved. It's just a sharing, not trying to pick a fight with anyone.
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It is a norm now. Many possible factors to it.
- Financial situation, can you afford having the children without financial stress and have a housekeeper while you spend time taking care of yourself?
- The man too nice from the start and the woman takes it for granted?
- Intimacy must come from both party effort. If both party base their relationship on feeling love, and no effort to love the other, sooner or later will die out then seperate. puppy lovey dovey is not forever. couples who hook up because of puppy love feeling never last. Couples who make a choice and put the effort in the intimacy will last.
So many reasons.
And I have to agree sex is very important in a relationship. So is effort to keep the relationship intimate