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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
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Click here for my latest post to return Up.Thanks! F **king Retarded/Scumbag Guy In My Ignore List |
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
"Of course I won't laugh," said the nurse. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient." "Okay then," said Bob, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the smallest male part the nurse had ever seen. In length and width was almost identical to a AAA battery.
Unable to control herself, the nurse tried to stop a giggle, but it just came out. Feeling very badly that she had laughed at the man's part, she composed herself as well as she could. "I am so sorry," she said.. "I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a nurse and a lady, I promise that won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?" "It's swollen," Bob replied. She ran out of the room.
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Please excuse me if my desire to ignore you is stronger than my desire to give a fuck about your thoughts
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
The Rumor Spreader
An Alabama pastor addressed his congregation, saying, “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the KKK. This is a horrible lie. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the person who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God.” No one moved. The preacher continued, “Do you have the courage to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven, and in your heart, you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression.” Again, all were quiet. Then, slowly, a gorgeous blonde stood up with her head bowed, and her voice quivered as she spoke, “Reverend, there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets.” |
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
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Even fools seem to be wise if they keep quiet; if they don't speak, they appear to understand. IOU-JL,Twintowers,waikeekee,NorthEast,Honestcrook |
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SirLance is back and rides through sbf! Point exchange with Min 5 pts. |
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
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Even fools seem to be wise if they keep quiet; if they don't speak, they appear to understand. IOU-JL,Twintowers,waikeekee,NorthEast,Honestcrook |
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
Everyone asked a 100-year-old man for his health secrets:
The old man said: I'll tell you a secret. I've been married for 75 years. Promised my wife when we got married that when two people quarrel, the loser has to walk for 5 kilometers. I've been walking 5 kilometers every day for 75 years! Everyone asked again: But how come your wife's very healthy as well? The old man answered: I'll tell you another secret. She'd been following me to make sure I really finish the 5 kilometers!
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Please excuse me if my desire to ignore you is stronger than my desire to give a fuck about your thoughts
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
Thanks for sharing all the nice jokes.
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
Thanks all for sharing very nice jokes
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Re: Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]
A Wife came Home early and found her Husband in their Bedroom making love to a very Attractive Young Woman. She was very Upset.
"You are a Disrēspêctful Pīg!"_ she Cried. "How dare you do this to me – a Faithful Wife, the Mother of your Children! I'm Leaving you. I want a Divorce, NOW!" The Husband calmly replied, _"Hang on just a Minute Love. At least let me tell you what Happened." "Fine, go ahead",_ the Wife Sobbed, _"but they will be the last Words you say to me!" The Husband Began: "Well, as I was getting into the Car at Work to drive Home, this Young Lady here asked me for a Lift. She looked so Distressed, Helpless and Defenceless that I took Pity on her and let her into the Car." "She was very Thin, not well Dressed and very Dirty and told me that she hadn't Eaten for Three Days." "Out of Compassion, I brought her Home and Warmed up the Pizza I made for you last Night that you wouldn’t eat because you're afraid you'll put on Weight. The Poor thing Ate it, Ravenously." "She was Dirty. I suggested she have a Shower. While Showering, I noticed her Clothes were Filthy and Threadbare. I threw them away." "I gave her the Designer Jeans that you’ve had for a Few Years, but don’t Wear because you say they are too Tight." "I gave her Underwear, your Anniversary Present from me, which you don’t Wear because you said I don't have Good Taste." "I gave her the Sexy Blouse my sister gave you for Christmas, that you don’t Wear just to annoy her. "I also donated those Boots you bought at an expensive Boutique but don’t Wear because someone at Work has the same Pair." The Husband Paused, took a quick Breath and continued: "She was so Grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the Door, she turned to me with Tears in her Eyes and said, “Please Sir... Do you have anything else that your Wife doesn’t use?" |
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