Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

[leinlac]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Nice one bro ROFL

[Aprose]

Good one. Love reading it

[Cash8877]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

thanks so much for sharing this joke, it's funny.

[bigbirdbird]

An Australian ventriloquist visiting Malaysia sees Zakir Naik sitting on his porch patting his pet rabbit. He figures he'll have a little fun.

Ventriloquist: "G'day Mate! Good looking rabbit, mind if I speak to him"

Zakir Naik: "The rabbit doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie"

Ventriloquist: 'Hello rabbit, how's it going mate?'

Rabbit: 'Doin' all right.'

Zakir Naik: (look of extreme shock)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at Zakir Naik)

Rabbit: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Rabbit: 'Real good. He feeds me great food and takes me to the farm once a week to play.'

Zakir Naik: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

Zakir Naik: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either.... I think.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going buddy?'

Horse: 'Cool'

Zakir Naik: (absolutely dumbfounded)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?'

Horse: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements.'

Zakir Naik: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your goat?'

Zakir Naik: That goat's a fucking liar, I didn't do anything I swear

[WankJanice]

Just for Laugh to take away your worries:

🔴 Wife : Shall I prepare Curry or Soup today?
Husband : First make it, we will name it later.

🔴 A frustrated husband in front of his laptop :
Dear Google, please do not behave like my wife ...
Please allow me to complete my sentence before you start guessing & suggesting.

🔴 A married man's prayer :
Dear God, You gave me childhood, You took it away, You gave me youth, You took it away. You gave me a wife ... It's been years now, just reminding You.

🔴 A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 5:30 after work. His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in.

"My hair & makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I'm still in my pajamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight ! Why the hell did you bring him home for?"

Husband answer "Because he's thinking of getting married".

🔴 Husband : I found Aladdin's lamp today.
Wife : Wow! what did u ask for darling??
Husband : I asked him to increase your brain ten times.
Wife : Oh darling ... love u so much.. Did he do that??
Husband : He laughed and said multiplication doesn't apply on zero.

🔴 Employee : Sir You are like a lion in the office! What about at home ???
Boss : I am a lion at home too, But there we have a lion tamer !!!

🔴 A man gave his wife a diamond necklace for their anniversary and wife didn't speak to him for 6 months.
Was the necklace FAKE?
Nooooo ! That was the deal.

🔴 A couple was having dinner at a fancy restaurant. As the food was served, the husband said, "the food looks delicious, let's eat."
Wife : Dear, you say prayer before eating at home.
Husband : That's at home ... here the chef knows how to cook.

🔴 Best Slogan on a MAN's T-Shirt :
"Please Do Not Disturb me, I am Married and already very Disturbed"😂

[Hurricane88]

Jokes more...

[Hurricane88]

Most popular prata in town


Another joke

[Hurricane88]

Can't hold my laugh after reading this...
A Guy🏃 in a hurry used the
ladies toilet🚺 in a posh
hotel..

He sat dow n🚽 and
noticed four buttons -
🔺WW, 🔺WA, 🔺PP & 🔺APR...

Curious, he pressed 🔺WW &
his butt was gently
sprayed🚿 with WARM
WATER,
he loved it so much..!!

He then pressed 🔺WA & a
blast of WARM AIR💨 dried
him up. Still loving it😃...,

He pressed PP & a
POWDER PUFF💭 to make him
smell fresh.
Feeling pampered😊..,

He decided to press the last button APR.
He later woke up in a
hospital🏥
A 👩Nurse smiled & said to
him "Sir, APR means
AUTOMATIC PAD REMOVER.
Your balls are in the jar
over there!!

[Hurricane88]

More pictorial jokes...

[wuhan]

Super nice! Very funny thread. Thanks.

[Snoke]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

More pictorial jokes...

So many animals waiting. Thanks for jokes.

[dyelook]

laughter bumps....

[eveofxmas]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Most popular prata in town

Agreed now prata can make masks. Cheers.

[RobotCop]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

More pictorial jokes...

Thanks for sharing the jokes

[Chile1962]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Nice share bro, thanks