Frequency of Sex of Married Couple

[Nokia69]

totally can feel your pain. In a similar no-sex situation as yours. And equally fertile.

Speaking my mind out loud, its a good thing for you if she decides to go and the kids stay with you.

[girlassassin]

Originally Posted by temi

Mine slightly different, after 1st baby still frequent and have 2nd then 3rd then 4th then 5th babies.

Then stop.

Mine slightly different too, not stopping and trying for no. 6

[YELLOW]

u believe the other guy never F ur wofe mah ?? if u do its ok ....

crux is urself ... she is obviously out of this marriage aldy . and staying for the kids becos the other guy prob alsp dont wan her ...

think for urself . u too can jus stay for the kid ..... jus lead separate lives .... tgif bro

Originally Posted by leelu717

Thank you for sharing, if there are any lady members reading this I would also like to have some input from the female perspective.

Just to give some history to this topic
I’m married for almost 20 years now but I can tell you that I can count the number of times my wife and I have sex with my fingers and toes.
During the 8 years of courtship my wife was very strict in absolutely no intercourse, of cos we were not saints and we had HJ each other probably about once a month.
So the 2 virgins happily got married and as we were very fertile, my wife conceived our first child within the first month with just 3 rounds (separate days of cos). During her pregnancy sex was a no-no to her and hence I engaged my 5 girlfriends (my fingers on my right hand) during that period of time. After the birth of my first child we had at best once a year and it was always me who requested for it numerous times before she gave in. Life goes on with such routine and my relationship with my 5 girlfriends remain active.
Then after a few years my wife wanted a second child and that was when she initiated. As we were older, our hit rate was not so high and she conceived my second child only after 5 rounds over 2 months.
Pregnancy period was again a no-sex-period for her. Not only that after my second child was born, there were none until my second child turned 4 (meaning all most 5 years in total).
That period of time was extremely tough for me, but that was the period when my career “took-off”. I had a good job that allowed us to have a decent size (in Singapore context) HDB, a Korean made family size car, and average 2 overseas holidays a year. My wife eventually decided to quit her job and be a stay at home mom. We are not rich but we are comfortable, and for just an O level graduate this was something I never thought I could have.
Life at work also started to exposed me to entertainment in clubs and pubs, and this was when I learnt that paid service was common. I fell for the first temptation during that 5 years of dryness.
On top of that my wife and I drifted apart for different reasons. I resent her for lack of physical intimacy and she resent me for not spending enough time with her and our children due to my busy work schedule.
Life goes on for a few more years with me falling for temptations another time but throughout my 5 girlfriends who don’t charge were still my main source.
Like the Chinese saying, you will come across a tiger eventually if you climb too many mountains. My wife found out about me engaging paid services and of cos she was extremely angry and disappointed. I tried to defend myself with the theory of men’s needs but she always insisted that a marriage cannot be built on sexual desire, and I can only agree that a marriage cannot be built on sexual desire ONLY. She eventually chose to stick around for the sake of our children which till today I am so grateful of.
Life continue to go on with the same routine of once a year. But temptations in Singapore is everywhere and I fell one more time.......... and “lucky” enough my wife caught me again. It was a crisis at that point and I requested that we see a marriage counsellor which she declined immediately, thinking that it is solely my fault and my problem and that I cheated and lied to her repeatedly and hence counselling help will not work, it was simply my fault.
After using all kinds of reasoning with her she had decided to stay on with this lousy marriage, and of cos for the sake of our children.
Our resentment towards each other grew stronger slowly but surely, by the day, and the time we spend with each other and the communications that we have almost non existent.
They say you reap what you sow. Recently I uncovered that she has been secretly seeing another man. From the WhatsApp messages they exchanged I know she has a very strong feeling for him. That broke me from head to toe. She initially tried to deny and hide, and finally admitted when I showed her solid evidences. She insisted that the affair is non sexual and she was looking for companion and attention, and this is due to my cheating and neglecting the family.
While I don’t blame her as I was the one cheated on her first, she never recognised that there was a reason why I fell for temptations.

Well, now I am at the crossroad not knowing what to do. She stayed on after knowing I cheated on her, but am I able to really get over this? The fact is I still love her so very much.

Best of all, I just loss my job.........

What will change from now? I really don’t know.

Well, if you have read till this point, I thank you for your time and contribution.

[ouzo18]

I totally can understand your feeling. But i think the issue is that she didn't allow you for sex, that's why u engaged paid service.
Anyway i think is no big deal for paid service. You are not having affairs.( Opinions from a late 40s married man.....lol)

[I Love Boobs]

Originally Posted by leelu717

Thank you for sharing, if there are any lady members reading this I would also like to have some input from the female perspective.

Just to give some history to this topic
I’m married for almost 20 years now but I can tell you that I can count the number of times my wife and I have sex with my fingers and toes.
During the 8 years of courtship my wife was very strict in absolutely no intercourse, of cos we were not saints and we had HJ each other probably about once a month.
So the 2 virgins happily got married and as we were very fertile, my wife conceived our first child within the first month with just 3 rounds (separate days of cos). During her pregnancy sex was a no-no to her and hence I engaged my 5 girlfriends (my fingers on my right hand) during that period of time. After the birth of my first child we had at best once a year and it was always me who requested for it numerous times before she gave in. Life goes on with such routine and my relationship with my 5 girlfriends remain active.
Then after a few years my wife wanted a second child and that was when she initiated. As we were older, our hit rate was not so high and she conceived my second child only after 5 rounds over 2 months.
Pregnancy period was again a no-sex-period for her. Not only that after my second child was born, there were none until my second child turned 4 (meaning all most 5 years in total).
That period of time was extremely tough for me, but that was the period when my career “took-off”. I had a good job that allowed us to have a decent size (in Singapore context) HDB, a Korean made family size car, and average 2 overseas holidays a year. My wife eventually decided to quit her job and be a stay at home mom. We are not rich but we are comfortable, and for just an O level graduate this was something I never thought I could have.
Life at work also started to exposed me to entertainment in clubs and pubs, and this was when I learnt that paid service was common. I fell for the first temptation during that 5 years of dryness.
On top of that my wife and I drifted apart for different reasons. I resent her for lack of physical intimacy and she resent me for not spending enough time with her and our children due to my busy work schedule.
Life goes on for a few more years with me falling for temptations another time but throughout my 5 girlfriends who don’t charge were still my main source.
Like the Chinese saying, you will come across a tiger eventually if you climb too many mountains. My wife found out about me engaging paid services and of cos she was extremely angry and disappointed. I tried to defend myself with the theory of men’s needs but she always insisted that a marriage cannot be built on sexual desire, and I can only agree that a marriage cannot be built on sexual desire ONLY. She eventually chose to stick around for the sake of our children which till today I am so grateful of.
Life continue to go on with the same routine of once a year. But temptations in Singapore is everywhere and I fell one more time.......... and “lucky” enough my wife caught me again. It was a crisis at that point and I requested that we see a marriage counsellor which she declined immediately, thinking that it is solely my fault and my problem and that I cheated and lied to her repeatedly and hence counselling help will not work, it was simply my fault.
After using all kinds of reasoning with her she had decided to stay on with this lousy marriage, and of cos for the sake of our children.
Our resentment towards each other grew stronger slowly but surely, by the day, and the time we spend with each other and the communications that we have almost non existent.
They say you reap what you sow. Recently I uncovered that she has been secretly seeing another man. From the WhatsApp messages they exchanged I know she has a very strong feeling for him. That broke me from head to toe. She initially tried to deny and hide, and finally admitted when I showed her solid evidences. She insisted that the affair is non sexual and she was looking for companion and attention, and this is due to my cheating and neglecting the family.
While I don’t blame her as I was the one cheated on her first, she never recognised that there was a reason why I fell for temptations.

Well, now I am at the crossroad not knowing what to do. She stayed on after knowing I cheated on her, but am I able to really get over this? The fact is I still love her so very much.

Best of all, I just loss my job.........

What will change from now? I really don’t know.

Well, if you have read till this point, I thank you for your time and contribution.

Women know they can benefit from the Women's Charter.
My wife got fat and ugly.
Denied me sex.
But had an affair after that (because some men will fuck anything)
The man promised to marry her.
I tried to salvage the marriage.
She insisted on divorce.
Divorce when through.
I'm happier divorced than I was married.
At least I can have sex with SYTs without the guilt trip....

[Katie956]

Married for 2 yrs.
Sex 2-3times a week. Frequency higher before my period.
If we are tired, once a week.
Anything lesser never tried. I wont allow it i will bbbj him until he cannot tahan and f me. Lols

[Kenrick]

For me,

Prior to marriage usually 2-3 times over the weekend when she stay over.

After marriage 1-2 times over the weekend.

Just 5 months into marriage, found out wife was pregnant and we stop having sex. Even after baby is 6 months, we still didn't resume sex. Baby does play a part as we are both exhausted. Fault is also on me because I didn't show interest in asking for sex either. So when she wanted, I just gave excuses.

Pretty unhealthy I guess.

[Rickey]

Originally Posted by Kenrick

For me,

Prior to marriage usually 2-3 times over the weekend when she stay over.

After marriage 1-2 times over the weekend.

Just 5 months into marriage, found out wife was pregnant and we stop having sex. Even after baby is 6 months, we still didn't resume sex. Baby does play a part as we are both exhausted. Fault is also on me because I didn't show interest in asking for sex either. So when she wanted, I just gave excuses.

Pretty unhealthy I guess.

Tats really bad of u bro wat u are doing to yr wifey ?? ....this will very likely drive her into the arms and legs of another man...if she doesn't, and still stays faithful and loyal to you, it is even more chek ark of u to deny her sex that she so rightfully deserves as yr wife and expects to get it from u her husband...is tat wat u like to see happen to her and ultimately your marriage??? .. if u don't want to service her, then better pass to bros here who can help you sexstify her...

[Koibitosan]

A normal sex relationship, irregardless of the years they are in marriage, should be at least once or twice a week. That's my opinion.

[Xgenre]

Originally Posted by leelu717

While I don’t blame her as I was the one cheated on her first, she never recognised that there was a reason why I fell for temptations.

Well, now I am at the crossroad not knowing what to do. She stayed on after knowing I cheated on her, but am I able to really get over this? The fact is I still love her so very much.

Best of all, I just loss my job.........

What will change from now? I really don’t know.

Well, if you have read till this point, I thank you for your time and contribution.

Stay in the marriage. Your kids are still in primary school. They will need both daddy and mummy. Be nice and respectful to your wife in front of them. You may not be a model husband but you can show them how to treat and respect a woman well (their mother).

Your wife is a stay at home mum. You will most likely have to pay alimony and child maintenance. If you are jobless and still get a divorce, how are you going to pay alimony and child maintenance? If you cannot pay, you end up in jail these days. With a criminal record, it will be harder to find a job. I know of a guy who went to jail because he cannot pay and he ended up a drug addict because of the people he was jailed with. So many assholes inside brainwash him to try drugs after his short jail sentence(to get him hooked). I am talking about Singapore story.

Your wife also seemed sensible. She chose to close 1 eye. A lady I know is actually happy her husband eats outside. Because he will not be pestering her for sex then. Besides no sex, how is she like as a person? Takes care of the house and kids well? She seems like she does not want to be a divorcee with 2 kids. Hard to re-marry also with such background. You want to find a new lady also not easy.

the current situation does not call for drastic changes. Main issue to solve now is find a job. Without money, a man is nothing.

[qissyalynne]

almost everyday! haha

[sexdonut]

Originally Posted by qissyalynne

almost everyday! haha

How many times a day?

[ejectjoy]

Originally Posted by Katie956

Married for 2 yrs.
Sex 2-3times a week. Frequency higher before my period.
If we are tired, once a week.
Anything lesser never tried. I wont allow it i will bbbj him until he cannot tahan and f me. Lols

Well done! Maintain a healthy body, keep the drive and intimacy going ... I always like to have strong passionate encounters with my other half. Even as we age (my children are grown ups) we keep going, at least once in two weeks, more often once a week!

[Livie]

TS, I would suggest u to get ur shit together.
If what u said is true, that u still love ur Wife and family, den mend ur marriage first rather than get curious about other ppl’s sexual frequency.

Ask ur Wife what she likes, what she enjoy about making love, why she stopped? What’s the reason? How to get back to the way y’all use to be?
Tell her how much u still want her, need her. A marriage cannot be based on sexual desire, neither can it live on without intimacy, she has to understand this and accommodate, I’m sure she has something that turns her on if she is chatting with other guy.

A genuinely happy marriage won’t let temptation’ slip through so dun use it as an excuse to cheat. 20 years together going through thick and thin is hard to come by, I hope u and ur Wife can continue unless u feel miserable Everyday.

Also get a job, every Father / husband is the pilar of the house, be a role model for ur kids, 找回当初!

[ilovepantyhose]

Originally Posted by Xgenre

Without money, a man is nothing.

the spouse who earns more money speaks louder