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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help.

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  #31  
Old 13-11-2021, 02:05 PM
lovemachine lovemachine is offline
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Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

I messed up hard in life before and turned my life around. I know how u feel.

Deep inside men, we are wired to be competitive.

But not all of us can make it up there.

The question here is, are you working hard enough?

Even when I was down and out running a company, to be honest I had nothing but a dream, a very strong conviction.

so strong that even though i was in debt for 15 years, i NEVER gave up no matter how hard life was. I do not wake up every day feeling motivated, i had to drag myself out of bed to proceed with my day.

This went on for over a decade. I lost count of how many failures I had.

Do u know what is the best part? Even during my low period, I had access to nice pretty girls who were willing to date me.

A few of them knew my situation and were willing to slog it out with me.

Reflecting on this, I would like to share my personal experience that:

1. While most if not all girls want rich men. Not all women who married rich men are happy. Girls are smart and they know rich men have the propensity to cheat. Maybe some girls purely dig rich men, at 39 years old, I have seen many such girls fuck up their marriages

2. Girls also consider men with dreams. Im born in a humble family. All I have is grit and determination to succeed. I am a sucker for pretty girls and even during my lowest point, girls i met in work (pretty, educated and NOT that materialistic) were happy to date me and some of them do like me.

the problem for me was, I knew i was hard on money while working on my biz. What if my biz fail? I dated them but for the longest time, I never dare pop the question of asking them to be my gf (my consideration was marriage, not a fling and not FWB). these are nice girls that no men should let down.

3. Chase girls and you lose money, chase money and you win girls

We all have to accept women are materialistic in nature and there is nothing wrong. The pressure is on us Men to make money and provide.

There were girls who told me I am very charming in work (I didnt have a house or car even then). Only a dream with a company that is always running into cash flow problems and I was in debt.

That was when I realised girls do not simply dig rich men. Quite a portion of them do believe in love and they do not mind going thro thick and thin with u if you are a resilient man.

Believe it or not, when some of the girls i met knew i had cash flow problems in my company, there were instances when they offered loans (interest free).

And reflecting harder again, i think what attracted them to me was not im handsome (im not handsome at all). but my relentless pursuit of my career (which seem a lost cause then)

So back to ur situation, whatever ur age is, even if you are not running a business, consider a sales job at least.

Be relentless in pursuing money, this is equivalent to the hunters back in stone age where we are valued for being able to provide.

Appearance does not matter at all for men, I have seen short and fat (im not judging here) men with pretty girls.

these are not short and fat men, these are men with dreams and who act on their dreams relentless.

Some times from what I learnt:
1. Be upfront about ur financial situation
2. Have a dream and a plan and work on them. Dun just talk, they can see
3. Pursue money relentlessly. Even if she knows you are not going to be a millionaire, she needs to know you will pursue money rentlentless no matter what

Btw the above happened to a few of my friends who are go getters. We started with nothing and ALL of us are lucky enough to find women who are willing to stick it out with us.

PS: Even during covid, there are people making good money. And I see opportunties where we can do simple business like renting out vans and hiring people to do logistic now. U must be willing to get ur hands dirty. Start from 1 van and grow slowly.

Life eat and breath your dream. Women WILL be attracted to u.

U dun need to be the richest 20% although we should all try. Start small, grow fast and dun stop, u just have to beat the rest of the 50%. And actually the biggest enemy is ourselves. Kick ur own ass and get moving.

All the best

Last edited by lovemachine; 15-11-2021 at 04:58 AM.
  #32  
Old 14-11-2021, 10:19 AM
larue larue is offline
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Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by lovemachine View Post
I messed up hard in life before and turned my life around. I know how u feel.

Deep inside men, we are wired to be competitive.

But not all of us can make it up there.

The question here is, are you working hard enough?

Even when I was down and out running a company, to be honest I had nothing but a dream, a very strong conviction.

so strong that even though i was in debt for 15 years, i NEVER gave up no matter how hard life was. I do not wake up every day feeling motivated, i had to drag myself out of bed to proceed with my day.

This went on for over a decade. I lost count of how many failures I had.

Do u know what is the best part? Even during my low period, I had access to nice pretty girls who were willing to date me.

A few of them knew my situation and were willing to slog it out with me.

Reflecting on this, I would like to share my personal experience that:

1. While most if not all girls want rich men. Not all women who married rich men are happy. Girls are smart and they know rich men have the propensity to cheat. Maybe some girls purely dig rich men, at 39 years old, I have seen many such girls fuck up their marriages

2. Girls also consider men with dreams. Im born in a humble family. All I have is grit and determination to succeed. I am a sucker for pretty girls and even during my lowest point, girls i met in work (pretty, educated and NOT that materialistic) were happy to date me and some of them do like me.

the problem for me was, I knew i was hard on money while working on my biz. What if my biz fail? I dated them but for the longest time, I never dare pop the question of asking them to be my gf (my consideration was marriage, not a fling and not FWB). these are nice girls that no men should let down.

3. Chase girls and you lose money, chase money and you win girls

We all have to accept women are materialistic in nature and there is nothing wrong. The pressure is on us Men to make money and provide.

There were girls who told me I am very charming in work (I didnt have a house or car even then). Only a dream with a company that is always running into cash flow problems and I was in debt.

That was when I realised girls do not simply dig rich men. Quite a portion of them do believe in love and they do not mind going thro thick and thin with u if you are a resilient man.

Believe it or not, when some of the girls i met knew i had cash flow problems in my company, there were instances when they offered loans (interest free).

And reflecting harder again, i think what attracted them to me was not im handsome (im not handsome at all). but my relentless pursuit of my career (which seem a lost cause then)

So back to ur situation, whatever ur age is, even if you are not running a business, consider a sales job at least.

Be relentless in pursuing money, this is equivalent to the hunters back in stone age where we are valued for being able to provide.

Appearance does not matter at all for men, I have seen short and fat (im not judging here) men with pretty girls.

these are not short and fat men, these are men with dreams and who act on their dreams relentless.

Some times from what I learnt:
1. Be upfront about ur financial situation
2. Have a dream and a plan and work on them. Dun just talk, they can see
3. Pursue money relentless. Even if she knows you are not going to be a millionaire, she needs to know you will pursue money rentlentless no matter what

Btw the above happened to a few of my friends who are go getter. We started with nothing and ALL of us are lucky enough to find women who are willing to stick it out with us.

PS: Even during covid, there are people making good money. And I see opportunties where we can do simple business like renting out vans and hiring people to do logistic now. U must be willing to get ur hands dirty. Start from 1 van and grow slowly.

Life eat and breath your dream. Women WILL be attracted to u.

U dun need to be the richest 20% although we should all try. Start small, grow fast and dun stop, u just have to beat the rest of the 50%. And actually the biggest enemy is ourselves. Kick ur own ass and get moving.

All the best
Good share, thanks.

But we all know people must totally they want to change, that life can be better than it is. Like quitting smoking. Without full conviction that that is what one really wants, failure is guaranteed.

Unfortunately it is always easier to blame someone or circumstances for ones own predicament to avoid action. Such is human nature.
  #33  
Old 15-11-2021, 01:16 PM
iluvbreast iluvbreast is offline
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Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Eequalsmc2 View Post
I kinda agree though I'm a bit more harsh the pareto principle states that 20 % will have access to 80% of the women so that means if you are a loser in the bottom 80% of men you will have only access to 20% of the women. But this doesn't mean you can't engage in arbitrage eg top 20 % men in Singapore earn 10k monthly you only earn 7k so you can move to Thailand Vietnam where your 7k puts you in the top 20% of men. Just note that in any race there are only 3 winners 1st 2nd and 3rd and even 2nd place means you are first loser. In my mind it's not that hard to get into top 20% if you reasonably smart willing to put in effort and work hard eg maintaining decent body just that most men can't be bothered.
I think you don't understand what TS is saying...from what he posted his problem is hardly one of finances...

The man can afford sugar babes to keep him company when he is bored....how many of us can afford do that?

c'est la vie...you win some you lose some....some of my ex gfs are like vases, very pretty to look only, then there are plain janes who u think are boring but ended the first date on a high....c'est la vie
  #34  
Old 06-12-2021, 11:13 PM
Peacekeeping Peacekeeping is offline
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Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

Firstly I thank sammyboy for giving this forum for us to 谈心. Almost wanted to cry as I can relate to the posts. I had great dreams in my teens, wanted to settle down with a loving pretty wife and great career. Now I’m in mid 30s and still achieved nothing significant, no wife, no true friends. It’s also difficult to find a gal who can appreciate me. So I spend every weekend buying “love” like many lonely guys out there. It’s really time for me to focus about myself, to achieve the things I want. Bro’s advice about not chasing the gals is true indeed.
  #35  
Old 07-12-2021, 10:02 AM
JacqueMerlin JacqueMerlin is offline
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Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SadLoser View Post
No matter how hard I try, simply cannot find a GF. Feeling quite defeated and depressed. So now I just pay for sex or look for sugar babe when I need company.

Dun have to deal with rejections, uncertainties and dramas. Just pay and get what I want. Is it considered loser?
If money is not the problem, then you are attracting the wrong crowd. Or looks?
  #36  
Old 07-12-2021, 10:23 AM
pearlnjewel pearlnjewel is offline
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Talking Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Peacekeeping View Post
Firstly I thank sammyboy for giving this forum for us to 谈心. Almost wanted to cry as I can relate to the posts. I had great dreams in my teens, wanted to settle down with a loving pretty wife and great career. Now I’m in mid 30s and still achieved nothing significant, no wife, no true friends. It’s also difficult to find a gal who can appreciate me. So I spend every weekend buying “love” like many lonely guys out there. It’s really time for me to focus about myself, to achieve the things I want. Bro’s advice about not chasing the gals is true indeed.
Lol you talk like star awards

This forum quite good talk it out without being judged. Haiyo bro a lot of gals also have the same problem cant find guys they like especially dinobus. I stopped going out to find love from prostitutes since the girls all increased price so much, i will not pay 150 for one fuck because the satisfaction rate is no longer the same. Last time 150 i can 2 shots and feel very satisfied for a few days now 150 1 shot i still craving sex 20 minutes later and miserable when i reached home.

I realised one thing is that my job now is much more relaxed and that helps so much in creating a good lifestyle in that i experience much lesser impulse to look for prostitutes.
Last time my job was very stressful and the high stress led me to impulsively keep looking for prostitutes. So maybe switch your career and lifestyle so you will be able to rely less on prostitutes and chasing girls.

You can consider sex doll that looks like real human and i saw some photos some are really great looking and really looks like a human. Think many china guys are using thesex dolls.

I saw one user looking to let go of his her totally new sex dolls here in this forum under The legal geylang prostitute scene, the thread call sex doll
  #37  
Old 15-12-2021, 01:57 PM
limking limking is offline
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Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

A person is a loser if only he thinks he is . No one is born a loser .
Every single person have some positive character no matter how bad or down trodden he seems to be . Find out about your positive parts & put them to use in your courtship . Be realistic find someone around your age gab so both can be on the same frequency length on thoughts & conversations . After all beside sex , companionship is what you are after . Remember Inner beauty of a person will grow as time passes by but the outer beauty will fade .
  #38  
Old 15-12-2021, 02:15 PM
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StealthBomber StealthBomber is offline
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Re: Am I a loser if I have to pay for sex/pay for companionship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by limking View Post
Be realistic find someone around your age gab so both can be on the same frequency length on thoughts & conversations . After all beside sex , companionship is what you are after . Remember Inner beauty of a person will grow as time passes by but the outer beauty will fade .
I agree with the age gap have to be small. You may not look like a loser but will look ridiculous if there's a big gap in age between you and the girl. Eveyone with only one look know it is paid companionship.

OTOH paying for companionship is nothing to mark as Loser. Look at epstein. All the rich and famous including royalty flock to him. He definitely paid for all those underage.
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